At this time, pickleball made me cry.
Rising up my childhood was all about teachers and tennis tennis tennis. My dad was a USTA coach and I educated a lot I hated it. Positive he taught me lovely kind and method, however I by no means discovered easy methods to have enjoyable. Regardless that it’s been years since I’ve stopped competing, I can nonetheless hear the yelling anytime I step on a court docket and my ball hits the web or goes out.
Profitable was profitable. However dropping wasn’t dropping. It was failing. Failing my coach, my dad, my staff, and myself.
I chilly turkey stopped taking part in tennis after HS as a result of mentally, it gave me an excessive amount of anxiousness. Plus bodily, I couldn’t play like I used to anymore. I had badly injured my wrist my sophomore season. My profession on the court docket was over.
However right now, many many lifetimes later – one thing in me requested to strive one thing new.
It requested to strive pickleball. Similar-ish idea as tennis however smaller racquet, smaller court docket, and lighter ball.
At first, I used to be getting so annoyed at my timing bc the ball was bouncing in another way and I used to be actually lacking the ball and swinging at air! I stored yelling at myself the identical method my coaches used to.
Later that evening, Sam requested if I needed to play a recreation and my quick response was “completely not as a result of it would spoil our relationship.”
For the following 2 hrs we peeled the onion and man, there may be loads of trauma I have to work via.
When Sam was asking me to play, he thought it could be a enjoyable recreation.
However what I HEARD was he needed to beat me. And if he beat me, it could imply me dropping. And me dropping, means me failing. And me failing means me being nugatory. And nugatory was how I felt anytime I misplaced a recreation.
Then he mentioned one thing that introduced me to tears. He mentioned “It’s good to discover ways to lose.”
After I heard that, I noticed, omg. I had by no means been instructed it’s okay to fail. I’ve solely ever been coached easy methods to win, by no means easy methods to lose…with out dropping my self value. I began crying.
I’ll all the time be pleased about my dad and my tennis journey however right now I would like to start undoing my previous so as to transfer ahead.
PS: I’m sporting the POPFLEX Mockneck shruggie (s/m), corset bra (xs) + pirouette skort (s). I’m 5’5”.